Fear of the Unknown
by rachelelizabeth-p
Summary: The year is 1918, and Mrs. Celia Aster-Grace is in the hardest year of her life.
1. Chapter 1

Winter in 1918 was proving to be harder then Celia Aster-Grace had ever imagined.

This particular November morning she stood alone at her kitchen sink, absentmindedly washing the dishes. The four oldest children had already gone off to school, excited to play afterwards in the light dusting of snow that had fallen the previous night. The youngest of the five, eight-month-old Hugo, slept soundly in the bassinet Celia had set up beside her.

Celia's thoughts were scattered. She paid little attention to how long she had been washing a single dish or the fact that the water had started draining. She didn't even hear the knocking on the front door or its opening.

"Celia!"

Celia jumped at the sound of her sister-in-law's voice behind her. She spun around and put her finger against her lips.

"SHHH!"

Katherine Kelly froze in the doorway of the kitchen. Her hair was pulled back out of her face, hinting that Katherine had been up working for most of the night and into this morning. Though she had on a coat, Celia could tell that Katherine wasn't wearing her usual work dress but a simple frock, one she would never wear out of the house. Katherine tiptoed into the room.

"Sorry, I didn't realize he would be sleeping. How's my little nephew doing?" Katherine whispered, leaning over the bassinet to smile at Hudson.

"He's doing well," Celia replied, "He almost slept through the night." She turned back around the sink and continued to scrub a teapot. Hudson had slept through most of the night, only waking up early this morning. Celia, on the other hand, hadn't gotten a wink and was glad to get up with her son. She was sure she looked awful, not bothering to change out of her nightdress or do her hair.

Katherine squeezed Celia's arm, scaring her. "Did you hear the news?" she asked, unable to conceal the excitement in her voice.

Celia shook her head. "Mr. Stevens picked up the girls so I haven't been to town yet. I'm guessing it's big or you wouldn't be here."

Katherine turned Celia towards her, Celia still holding the ceramic pot in her soapy hands. Celia was shocked to see tears in Katherine's eyes. Katherine had never been much of a crier. The only time Celia had seen her get emotional was when they sent Jack off to France to fight.

"The war's over! Our boys are coming home!" Katherine exclaimed with a squeal.

The teapot slipped from Celia's hands and shattered on the ground. Katherine and Celia both stepped out of the way of the mess in shock. Katherine knelt down to start picking up the pieces, but Celia shooed her away.

"I got it." Celia said curtly, and Katherine backed away with a questioning look. Celia swept up the remnants of her her favorite teapot and threw them in the garbage. She leaned against the counter top, face in her hands.

"What is it?" Katherine asked quietly, "Aren't you excited?"

Celia sighed, shaking her head. She let her hands fall down beside her.

"I got a telegram a few days ago from one of Nate's officers in France," Celia began quietly, "Nate was wounded in action and flown to a hospital in England. They don't know if he's going to make it."

Katherine gasped, running over to hug Celia tightly. "I'm so sorry," she whispered.

That's when Celia finally broke. The tears she had held in for all this time fell through, and in her tiny cold kitchen, Celia cried harder than she ever had before.

* * *

><p>The shipyard was freezing, full of anticipation-filled families watching for the first sign of their husbands and fathers disembarking from the ship in the harbor.<p>

The Kelly children stood close together, Ruth, Wes, and Joey hugging each other to keep warm. Katherine stood with Celia, holding Celia's hand much tighter than she liked. Katherine was extremely anxious, her face pale but alert. It was obvious to Celia that Katherine hadn't slept last night, the dark circles under eyes even more illuminated in the whiteness of her skin tone.

At least, Celia and her were in the same situation because of that aspect.

Celia wasn't sure if she was going to be able to do this. Watching her brother come home was one thing, but seeing the countless families reuniting while she didn't know if she would ever see Nate again pushed her to decline Katherine's invitation at first. Katherine however turned desperate, and Celia had decided to go to be there for her. Celia's children were back at the house in the care of Miss Medda and her husband, who had stepped in to help whenever they could when Nate shipped out.

Suddenly, cheers started to erupt at the front of the crowd closest to the ship. The soldiers were disembarking. The first of them started to reach Celia and the Kellys, but none were familiar.

Katherine leaned in to Celia. "I told him that we would try to stay near the last lampost."

Celia nodded, still looking for a sign of her brother.

Instead, she saw her husband. With his cut blond hair and stiff uniform, he looked just as he had the day he left. Celia stepped forward towards him, but was stopped by Katherine's hand.

"Did you see him?" she asked.

Celia blinked and realized that it wasn't Nate she had seen, but someone who looked so much like him that her chest hurt. She let go of Katherine's hand. "I'm sorry. I can't do this. I'll be near the car," Celia blurted out.

Katherine must've noticed the heartbreak in Celia's voice because she simply nodded before turning back around to look for Jack. Celia fought her way out of the people, blocking the sounds of celebration. She finally reached the street and continued down a while till she reached the Kellys' small motorcar. The doors were locked as expected so Celia took a seat on a nearby bench. She bent over, covering here face in her hands, as she fought against the stinging tears that threatened to spill out.

There was a creak as someone sat down beside her.

"You wanna know something?" The person asked, sounding familiar. "I still think that Cece is a great nickname."

Celia looked up with a smile.

Her brother lounged against the wood backing of the bench, hands in his pockets and hat lop-sided.

"I told you not to call me that," Celia sighed, trying to sound annoyed though she couldn't be happier to see him.

Jack shrugged his shoulders. "I guess Celia works just fine too. Now, do I get a hug or what?"

Celia practically jumped on him, hugging her brother with all her might. He hugged her back in just the same way. Celia suddenly began to cry, from elation and heartbreak she wasn't sure of. Yet, Jack seemed to understand.

"He'll come back, Celia. I'm sure of it."

* * *

><p>Nights were the worst.<p>

The darkness had always terrified Celia, ever since her stay at the Refuge. The nightmares made her lose so much sleep that she wasn't even sure if she actually still slept.

The only remedy was the fireplace in the front room. Celia made sure a fire was constantly blazing in the winter. She had fallen asleep so many times on the couch that she had lost track.

That's exactly where she was on Christmas Eve, curled up asleep on the satin sofa. The clock was about to strike one, and the house was silent. Twenty young newsboys and five children slept in their beds upstairs, dreaming of Christmas presents in the morning, the very presents sitting underneath the overly decorated tree. Everything was quiet.

Until the knock at the door.

Celia awoke with a start. She sat up, rubbing her eyes. Stragglers this late weren't unusual, newsboys caught up in the city. One on Christmas Eve was a bit odd, but Celia still got up and pulled on a robe. She ruffled the curls in her hair, hoping they weren't too crazy. Yawning, she walked to the front door. She wasn't able to see who was outside or rather she had forgotten to check.

Celia unlocked the locks and turned the knob, expecting to see a tired fifteen-year old with a few cents for lodging. Instead, she found a soldier standing in the shadows. Her mind immediately thought of the worst. Her husband was dead.

The soldier stepped forward, the glow from the fireplace illuminating his figures. He had weary blue eyes lined by dark circles. Something had burned his cheek, the skin puckered but healed. The man was thin and lanky, his uniform hanging off him. He smiled, and Celia felt a sense of familiarity.

"I forgot my keys."

_NATE._

Celia took a step back in shock. Was her husband really standing before her? She reached out her hand tentatively and touched the man's scarred cheek softly. "Nate?" she whispered.

He nodded, holding her hand against his cheek. "It's me. I'm here."

A tear traced down Celia's face. Neither of them moved, completely frozen in that one spot. Celia suddenly jumped forward, hugging him with all her might. Nate hugged her back with equal enthusiasm. He murmured Celia's name over and over, kissing her hair, her shoulder, her cheek.

"I didn't know if you would ever come back." Celia cried, burying her face into Nate's shoulder.

"Of course, I came back," Nate replied. The sound of a baby's cry broke them apart, and Celia grinned at her husband.

"Would you like to meet your son?"


	2. Author's Note

I'm trying to update Fear of The Unknown as often as I can, but there will be just one more little section tacked onto the first chapter to finish it off. I hope you guys are liking it, and thank you to the person who gave some feedback!


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